Community not Comfort

We had our immersion experience yesterday, visiting Isaiah House in Santa Ana (A Catholic Worker House).  I have wondered about Catholic Worker houses since I read a book about Dorothy Day.  I was intrigued by it.  Who are these people that give up so much to live in community with others?  Sharing everything with them and sacrificing their privacy.  I need my "me" time, my privacy.  I think this would be the biggest sacrifice to me.

I found our visit a bit nerve wracking at first.  We were just there, no job to do, no items to be handed out.  We had only ourselves and it left me feeling exposed and inadequate.  The ladies I was able to talk to you were nice and fairly open.  These were not people you would expect to be living on the street.

I was able to speak a little with Leah, one of the Catholic Workers living there.  She spoke of community and as not seeing these women as "a problem to be solved.".  Isn't that what we always want to do?  We want to solve the problem.  How much harder is it to get to know them??  How much easier is it to assign blame and pass judgment when we don't know them?

Our Session 5 meeting is this morning.  The week is a little fast-tracked since we had session 4 on Thursday.  Doesn't leave a lot of time to get the reading done.  But thanks to the 10 teenage boys at my house overnight I was up at 5 AM and was able to get my reading done.

The Compassion book is really getting to me.  Last week's reading about community left me a little confused.. I wasn't sure how to bring together what they were telling me. "Compassion reveals itself in community" was one of the quotes.  I wasn't sure what that meant - can I not be compassionate on my own?  Do I need to be acting only in community?  Now, I see that I didn't really get it at all.

I just finished the chapter "Displacement" and it is beginning to take shape in my head now.  This notion that when we are displaced we are "gaining distance from the world".  As long as we are motivated by what people in this world find interesting or important than we cannot truly live a life of compassion.

Of course, then I start thinking about where am I supposed to go?  Am I supposed to pack it all up and move somewhere else?  Live a radically different life?.... Maybe..  Maybe not-.  It seems I need to be attentive to what God is calling me to in the here and now.  What is He saying for me to do today?  What does he want me to notice today?  What can I learn today about what God is doing in my life and all around me?

I want to know it all right now.  What is God's plan for my life?  He doesn't work like that, so, I guess I'll have to be patient... and quiet,,,  so I can hear His voice.